I remember when I first began looking into the church that I am now a member of. I was sixteen years old, a junior in high school. For years I had been attending Wood Village Baptist Church (which is kind of ironic, since I live only sixty seconds from there now). I had known from a very young age that Jesus is real, and my personal Savior and Redeemer. I had read my Bible, and thought I understood it pretty well for a 16 year old. I had a few Mormon friends who never tried to push me towards their faith. Rather, I would try to push them towards mine. I was taught that Mormon's didn't believe that Jesus Christ was their Savior, and that they were consequently going to hell. This really concerned me, because one of my best friends in particular was Mormon, so I would invite him to our activities often in the hopes that he would be "saved." He would come nearly every time I invited him. He would invite me to his activities, and my parents would respond with a resounding NO. In fact, I wasn't even allowed to go over to his house until I was in high school, even though I had known him since we were both twelve.
So about four years pass with us being friends, and we have a lot of all-nighters. Unlike most kids that play video games and eat pizza we would make sushi and have religious and philosophical discussions. We were weird, I know. I should probably mention at this point that I was an extremely angry, troubled young person who did terribly bad in school. I would eventually barely graduate with a mere 2.5 GPA. I was scatterbrained, and I had absolutely no visions of attending college. In fact, I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. I thought that perhaps I would become a youth pastor of some sorts, or more likely enlist in the Marines or the Army.
Anyway, a few years passed like this, and eventually Matt offered me a copy of the Book of Mormon. I thought I knew what this book was all about, that it was written by some man named Joe Smith who claimed to be a prophet, but who was probably deceived by the devil. Honestly it scared me. I loved and respected Matt, so I didn't throw the book away, but I certainly wasn't going to read it. Instead, I put it in the bottom of my sock drawer, and tried to forget it existed.
Over the next year or so Matt would occasionally ask if I had read it. My response was always the same, "I don't have time." He would nod and say he understood. He never pushed me. In fact, he would usually only bring it up when I would try and argue with him about his religion. "Have you read the Book of Mormon and asked God if it is true?" I would say no and then he would say something like "well I have, and I know it's true. Until you've found out for yourself you can't really argue with me."
Junior year came, and Aaron, Matt's older brother, was preparing to serve as a missionary for his church. He would come to the school every day and give a bunch of us rides home. He had been picked on a lot during his years in high school, but I really admired and respected him. As we were walking towards the car, Matt Aaron and I, Aaron looked over at me and said "Matt gave you a copy of the Book of Mormon right?" Matt looked at Aaron like he was an alien. I responded that yes he had. He then asked "have you read from it yet?" Matt's eyes were getting bigger, I said that no I hadn't had time. He asked me "what are you doing tomorrow?" Now Matt was really surprised...I imagine he was thinking "what are you doing to my friend?!" I said nothing. Aaron then asked me if I would come over after school and read the Book of Mormon with them. To this day I don't know what brought about my response, I heard myself say "sure." I think Matt almost got whiplash as his head snapped from looking at Aaron, to looking at me surprise written all over his face.
When I got home from class that day I went into my bedroom, and found my copy of the Book of Mormon. I quietly put it into my backpack. I offered a heartfelt prayer that night that God wouldn't let me be led astray. That He would watch over me, and let me know if this book was actually from Him, or from some other source. I could hardly sleep that night. The next day was one of the longest of my life. Class was even more boring than usual. I could barely focus. All I could think about was that copy of the Book of Mormon in my backpack.
After class we went over to Matt and Aaron's house. We knelt down and Matt offered a prayer asking God to reveal to us whether or not the Book of Mormon was true. I was impressed that he didn't pray that God would reveal to me that the Book of Mormon WAS true, but that he prayed that we would all know whether or not, if it was or if it wasn't. I had a warmth wash over me then that I had only felt a few times before in very specific circumstances and had come to identify as the presence of the Holy Spirit. We started by reading from the end of the Book of Mormon, which I found curious, but now completely understand it. The last prophet to write in the Book of Mormon is named Moroni, and he wrote a promise that is unique in my experience to only this book. I will quote it here:
"Behold, I would exhort you that when ye shall read these things, if it be wisdom in God that ye should read them, that ye would remember how merciful the Lord hath been unto the Children of men, from the creation of Adam even down until the time that ye shall receive these things, and ponder it in your hearts. And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye should ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things."
-Moroni Chapter 10:3-5
https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/moro/10?lang=eng
After reading these few verses, we discussed it shortly, then went to the beginning of the Book, and started into it. We read quite a few chapters that day (I think that Aaron still remembers how many we read, I just remember having this continuous feeling of joy, peace, and warmth. I knew that day that God had answered my prayer, that the Book of Mormon was true, and that knowledge absolutely terrified me. You see, I liked my life. Sure I wasn't going anywhere, but I was comfortable. I knew how my parents felt about other religions, they were extremely vehement and open in their feelings about other churches. I knew that this knowledge was going to change my life, and I didn't want to accept the answer that I had received.
I continued to read and pray, hoping that I would get a different answer, but I couldn't deny it. Every time I would read and genuinely pray the answer would come. Yes, this is true. Eventually I "accepted my fate" as it were. After a few months I got up the courage to let my parents know. I took my mom aside one night and told her "I've been reading the Book of Mormon, I've prayed to know that it's true, and God has answered my prayer. Because of that I believe that Joseph Smith was a prophet, and that I need to be baptized a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints."
I won't give you all of the details of what ensued following this conversation as I've written that information elsewhere. What I will say is that after a few months of arguing, I ended up moving out, just after my 17th birthday. A year later, on my 18th birthday, I was baptized.
You'll remember that I said earlier that I was a troubled child. I barely graduated. I wish that I could say that my conversion to the Gospel of Christ as taught by the LDS Church was immediate, that my life instantly changed. I wish that I could say that I went from being an angry, hurting (both myself and others) person to a loving, caring, devoted child of God, but I didn't. In fact, not long after my baptism, I got worse. I "went off the deep end" so to speak. I hurt a lot of people very deeply.
So why do I talk about this when my post is about why I'm a Mormon? It's because of the contrast that I have experienced in my life since coming to know that the Book of Mormon is true, and choosing to become a member of the LDS Church. I have experienced both the dark (before I became a member) the really dark (after I became a member and chose to not live the teachings I had been taught and believed) and the light, and many shades of gray as I've gone up and down in my walk with Christ since that time.
You see, I'm happier now than I've ever been before, and that happiness continues to increase. Because of my membership in the LDS Church I have been able to serve as a missionary. For two years, twenty four hours a day seven days a week except when I was sleeping all I thought about was serving God and my fellow human beings. That experience changed me. Most of my life prior had been focused entirely on me, my needs, my wants. I came to really learn that serving others is truly Christlike, and brings about more joy than any amount of seeking it for yourself.
I prayed on my mission to know what God would have me do. I figured I would move back to Oregon, and go to school there. Instead I was very clearly directed to move to Utah, and attend school there. I knew only a handful of people in the state, and had no idea how I would pay for schooling, or anything for that matter. A string of "amazing coincidences" that I like to call miracles proceeded to occur and everything worked out. I received a full ride scholarship, found gainful employment, and a place to live.
Most importantly, I met the woman who would become my eternal companion. You see, as a member of the LDS Church I don't believe that marriage is "until death do ye part." I believe that marriage can be eternal, but only if one is married in the proper pattern, that is "sealed" in one of the temples. Kaija and I were sealed on January 2nd, 2009 in the Salt Lake City Utah temple. That was one of the happiest days of my life. Five and a half years later and I love her more today than I did then.
Since then I've received a bachelors degree with a 3.5 GPA, have become a 1st Lieutenant in the United States Army as a Chaplain Candidate, and currently hold a 3.9 GPA in my Masters Degree. I'm the Vice President of Cascade German Parts/Cascade Auto Parts/Bora Parts Inc., and have a 14 month old daughter who is the light of my life.
I list off these accomplishments not to say how wonderful I am, but to say how wonderful God is, and why I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. When asked how one could identify a true or a false prophet in the New Testament Jesus responded by saying:
"Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into fire. Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them." (Matthew 7:16-20, italics added for emphasis)
My initial acceptance of the LDS Church was through an overwhelming sense of peace, love, and joy. A good fruit. My life since then, when I have lived according to the things that I know to be true, is one giant fruit tree. Everything good in my life is the direct result of my membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
This isn't to say that my life is all ease and plenty. On the contrary, it's extremely difficult. I still struggle every day with the sins of my past, old addictions trying to creep back up and rob me of my joy, and just general bone-headed mistakes. I'm fallible, weak, and I really struggle with my weight, and depression. I'm a normal human being. But my life is infinitely better because of the LDS Church, because I'm a Mormon. I love this church. It is not without its faults. I do have questions that I continue to earnestly seek answers for, and believe that they will be answered in time.
If you are seeking more joy, more peace, more success, and more work (yes, lots and lots of work, but I promise this is a good thing) in your life, then please, do what I did. Read the Book of Mormon. Take Moroni's challenge. Ask me questions. I want everyone to feel the joy that I have felt. I promise you that if you will follow this pattern, that your life will-eventually-be better than you ever imagined. It won't be immediate, it took me a very long time of trudging through difficulty and heartache as I aligned myself with the Gospel of Christ, but I know that it will come.
